can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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