was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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