He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
