Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I am mentally ready for anal.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
