I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
