I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize