He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Randomize
