There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
