After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
