He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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