The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
