Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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