Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
