I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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