i think my mom watched the whole time
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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