We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I need a burrito and a hug.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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