oh god the rape fog is back!
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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