I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
