Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
