i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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