Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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