I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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