Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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