You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
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