I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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