Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
May the power of my ass compel you!!
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
