bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Randomize
