After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
