Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
