the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
