He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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