all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
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