I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He? As in you personified your dick?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
