Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
