Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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