i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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