this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
two words...techno handjob
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
