Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
