on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
