so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
