His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
