Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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