Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
