Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
