my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
