Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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