Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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