so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
