apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
