I want to have your abortion
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Randomize
